Measurement in the Men’s Room

A speechwriter has developed a method for assessing the impact for a speech. It's not quantifiable, but it is reliable.

A speechwriter liked my column about the impossibility of measuring the impact of a speech, but in an anonymous comment, claimed to have found a reliable, if not quantifiable, measurement method.

โ€œHere’s the secret,โ€ the speechwriter suggests. โ€œYour speaker must be scheduled for a spot on the program immediately before a break. As soon as the speaker wraps up, you (the speechwriter) make a beeline for the nearest restroom. If the buzz about the speech drowns out everything else going on, you win.โ€

And if not, the speechwriter suggests by implication โ€ฆ you lose.

High bar. โ€”DM

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